I'm Speaking Directly to You.

*co-authored by Emily Cates and Kandrea Wade

I don’t have time for “All Lives Matter” or “not all cops.” I don’t have time for you to put aside your discomfort of facing your own behavior. But more than that, Black people don’t have time. Every second you decide you’d rather justify and deflect is one more second that their lives continue to be in danger.

All you have to do is listen. You have to stop and listen. Listen to them. White women, remember when we joined women around the world in sharing our own experiences during the #YesAllWomen movement? Do you remember when many people pushed back and screamed “not all men” at us? Our response was simple. No, not all men are this way, but yes, all women have a story about being mistreated, assaulted, or harassed at the hands of a man. We even included some men who also had stories to tell. It’s time for you to listen to Black people and their stories. Many with confrontational cops. Many with retail security guards. Many with white people calling the cops on them for doing harmless things. You can say “not all cops” repeatedly, or you can just listen. You can learn how vastly different this country is for our brothers and sisters, if you would just listen.

And I don’t have time for “I don’t see color.” You have to see them. When you don’t, you erase all their stories. When you say it, you’re telling Black people that you don’t believe that their lived experience is real. I know on the surface “I don’t see color” sounds wonderful. We should all aspire to not judge anyone by the color of their skin, but until they actually aren’t judged by the color of their skin, we must acknowledge its role in every aspect of their lives. When you overstate your colorblindness to enhance your "wokeness" you are not helping our POC, you're actually hurting them. Your words end up often being nothing more than valor signalizing, pretending to care because it looks good. If you want to be open and accepting to all races and creeds, you must also understand that it comes with the hardships, historical struggle, and not so pretty aspects of living while being black. This means actually doing what is needed to address those pains and make efforts to make a better future for all. Understand it.

White people, you are seemingly so afraid to do the work, and I understand that it is scary to admit that you have racist behaviors. I know, I’ve been there. It’s so much easier to cry out that you’re not racist. And on an intentional level you aren’t racist, but there’s so much unintentional racism ingrained in everything we do as white people. Things you think are jokes could be harmful. Things you just dismiss because you’ve never seen it happen in person. Things you ignore because it doesn’t happen to you.

But the things you are scared to confront can be changed. You’re so ready to scream you’re not racist, but you’ve never done any of the work to analyze your actions. You get angrier at someone saying something you did was racist than at the actual racist act. You can do a racist things out of ignorance. You can learn from that ignorance. You can no longer do racist things. No one will call you racist again. It’s really that simple. And though we've been hurling these micro and macro aggression at Black people for centuries, and truly they have no reason to accept or help us, if you take the correct steps, they are here to help, guide and inform those who are genuinely here to learn to do better. A testament to the levels of forgiveness, hope and belief they have in us that we refuse have in them. No one wants to see the bad things they do. No one wants to think they are racist. But the whole truth is, the system is built that way.

Whether you like it or not, most of your ancestors built the laws and systems in this country to serve themselves. They owned slaves. Honestly, that’s all the proof you need. They owned other human beings. They made other Black human beings physically build this country while they created laws that said that was okay, and did nothing to benefit those who were literally doing the heavy lifting here. White people designed this place so they could profit off the oppression of others. You can try to argue that it is not true, but they owned slaves, they created Jim Crow laws, they designed our prisons and the people who would be put there so we can continue to profit off cheap exploitative labor of the same people we’ve always done this to. 

Every day that you decide you aren’t to blame is another day the system doesn’t change. You’re saying this system is okay because it benefits you. You tell them that you didn’t own slaves. You tell them it’s not your fault. You tell them you aren’t racist, but if you weren’t racist, you’d want this system to change. You don’t want to be blamed for the actions of your ancestors, but you are fine upholding the country they forced Black people to build. You’re saying police brutality is fine. You’re saying mass incarceration of Black people for the same crimes white people get away with is fine. You’re saying poverty and homelessness is fine even though we have plenty of resources to care for everyone. Your ancestors did this, you have to dismantle it. It’s not enough to say you didn’t do it. When you do nothing, you condone it.

Please note that when you say rioting and looting are not the answer, I hope that you amplified Colin Kaepernick’s voice when he took a knee. When you see Black protesters being peaceful and chanting, I hope you saw the tear gas being thrown anyway. When you see Black protesters begging opportunists who are using this event to steal and destroy with no agenda, I hope you understand the lengths they go to in order to been seen as human beings. They’re standing for their lives, asking people to stop making it worse, asking you to see them, and your focus seems to be on the stores with broken windows.

Those places can be rebuilt. Those stores will have insurance claims and GoFundMe campaigns, and their business will come back. GoFundMe campaigns won’t bring back George Floyd. Insurance claims won’t bring back Breonna Taylor. A broken window can be repaired. Ahmaud Arbery’s life won’t be. Or Treyvon Martin. Or Sandra Bland. Or Philando Castile. Or Tony McDade. Or Tamir Rice. The list is long.

Speaking of Tamir Rice. A 12-year-old boy was shot by the police for playing with a toy gun, and somehow that didn’t get you riled up. You’re upholding the system. You see, Black children don’t have a choice but to be born into a system that sees them as a target. Black children are born into a country that will literally tell them they will grow up to be criminals and thugs under the guise of inspiration to be better. You tell them to not be a stereotype, but no matter what they do, you see them as one still. He was 12. He had a toy gun.

Black people said “stop killing us” and you have a rebuttal.  It’s simple. There’s no rebuttal to “stop killing us.” If all lives matter, there’s no rebuttal to “stop killing us.” If you think we are all one human race, there’s no rebuttal to “stop killing us.” If you don’t see color and we are all the same, there’s no rebuttal to “stop killing us.”

Look at yourself deeply. The wonderful thing about ignorance is that you can change it. I know you don’t want to see that side of yourself. There might be some ugly truths hiding, but it's okay. You have to see it to change it. Think of the consequences of not understanding how you’re contributing to a racist society. Think of how many Black people died because white people chose to stay silent when it was necessary to hold someone accountable. Hold people in power to a higher standard than those who are reacting to that power.

You may decide the small amount of rioters and looters ruin a whole protest, but how many corrupt and overzealous cops does it take to ruin the police force? How many police vehicles have to drive into crowds of people? How many tear gas cans have to be thrown into crowns that include children? How many have to show up in full riot gear to a protest of unarmed people? How many rubber bullets have to be shot? How many Black lives must be taken?

The police could’ve ended this by asking the right questions, listening, creating immediate new policies. Governors, mayors, and even the president. They all could’ve prevented this if they made their statements about how to move forward with clear policy change and the use of unnecessary force by the police instead of denouncing the protests and threatening their own people. Minneapolis could’ve prevented this if they arrested and charged all four cops involved in George Floyd’s murder. But instead of putting in the work, they instigated a riot. Instead of listening to the people they govern, they dismissed them completely.

I hope you’re paying attention. Protests aren’t supposed to be comfortable and tied up in neat little bows. Protests are catalysts for change. Revolutions. The Boston Tea Party was a bunch of rioters and looters. It’s okay to be uncomfortable. It’s even okay to have conflicting nuanced feelings. Do you worry about small businesses? Sure. But are you tired of seeing innocent people murdered? That should be louder. It’s not okay to erase Black people’s stories because it makes you uneasy. It’s not okay to be more outraged at broken windows than murder. It’s not okay to trivialize everything Black people have worked so hard for because the system you’ve grown so accustomed to is being challenged. Do something. Fight for something bigger than your little bubble of comfort that only benefits you. It’s a White system. It needs to be changed.

The riots and protests are black people dismantling the system that you forced them to create for you. This country stands on the backs of the underrepresented and marginalized, and it is their right to remove the foundational blocks that they foraged to watch the people on top, those who have all of the power and position to create change but don't, to watch them fall. We ask them to breathe and exist in a country that we forced them to build, but we don’t let them live. One that we tell them is not meant for them. One that we tell them they cannot afford. One that we exclude them from rights and services. So do you blame them for burning it all down? Do you blame them for reclaiming the space and land that they developed and then were never given? Land that was stolen from Natives anyway. You took a land from one set of people, made another set of people build it, and then you called it yours. You can't blame them for being the Jenga block that we all rely on to hold everything up. Eventually that tower falls. And now we are mad and refuse to rebuild. We don’t want to play again even if it means everybody gets to play. Even if it means new rules that make the game more enjoyable for all who want to participate.

Please open your ears and your eyes. Stop coming up with another reason to ignore it. Stop deflecting and placing blame. It’s okay to be heartbroken by what is going on. But the saddest part is that it never had to come to this. White people have been comfortable in our silence for too long. Don’t be scared to get uncomfortable for Black lives. They’ve spent their whole lives learning how to be okay being uncomfortable for you.